Jealousy
"The state of an insecure mind"
Introduction
Defining Jealousy
Jealousy and envy are often interpreted to have similar meanings. Since the Catalyst – Envy has already been talked about, we will simply explore Jealousy as the suffering states of mind that one can experience when they perceive the person they love may leave them for someone else.
Jealousy thus can be experienced in many kinds of states, for instance, as a fear of losing someone that one loves. Or, it can be experienced as anger, for instance, one can be angry that the person they love is going leaving them. Jealousy can also be experienced as the experience of hurt and lonliness.
To simplify, Jealousy is simply the suffering states of mind experienced when one feels that their relationship with someone they love is in jeopardy.
In this article, we will explore the inner causes for the experience of jealousy and the ways one can transform it so that one can experience greater happiness in their relationships.
Jealousy In Depth
Let us explore the negative state of mind known as Jealousy to understand about it more.
Jealousy can be understood as a state of mind that is driven by one's insecurity, which is fueled by the fears of being replaced, for instance, by the fears of someone leaving us, of someone betraying us, of losing what one cherishes; basically, the fears to do loss.
To address the states of jealousy then, one must look within to explore why these fears are there.
The following questions can be asked:
"Why do I fear that I will be replaced?"
"Why do I fear that my loved one will leave me?"
"What do I believe I am lacking that is making the person want to leave me? "
"What reasons do I think the person I love may have for leaving me?
Exploring the answers to these questions will help one to find the deeper causes of their insecurity, which we will explore soon.
Importance
Importance Of Addressing Jealousy
Let us first explore some reasons why one would want to address the state of jealousy.
Jealousy can cause stressful relationships because it can make one over-clingy, over-possessive, and over-suspicious of the Other-Self. One can be driven by the states of jealousy to question and doubt the other person, which can lead to unhealthy conversations that are relationship-deteriorating rather than relationship-building.
No one likes being interrogated for things they haven't done!
Jealousy is fueled by the fear of losing the person they love, which when you think about it, is an impractical state of mind to carry because one can end up destroying the relationships they are trying to save with it.
Path Of Creator
Jealousy In Relation To The Path Of Creator
The journey of creating greater happiness is a journey of Self-Knowing and addressing one's suffering states of mind.
Having relationships with Other Selves is a great way for one to know themselves more because each Self can serve as a mirror for the other to see themselves clearer.
Through the ups and downs, harmony and frictions that one encounters in their relationships, one can discover deeper about their likes and dislikes, and also their suffering states of mind.
Jealousy is one of the many suffering states of the mind that one can experience when one is in a relationship with another Self, and the more intimate the relationship is, the more intense one can experience the states of jealousy if one has an insecure mind.
If one wishes to address the suffering states of mind that is jealousy, the practice of meditation can help one to understand more about it. Without meditation, one's focus on the cause of their jealousy can remain outwards, making them believe that it's their Other Half that has caused one's inner misery, which can lead to unnecessary arguments and hurt. When this happens, one can become stuck in the surface mind, which can prevent one from developing develop even greater Self-Knowing of the cause of their jealousy.
Inward Journey Into One's Jealousy
The journey of exploring the cause of one's jealousy will be an inward journey, more specifically, a journey of exploring the cause of one's insecurities. That is why the practice of meditation can be extremely helpful.
To develop Self-Knowing, one can also step away from their suffering relationships, for instance, taking a break from it temporarily so that one can get a better grasp of what's happening. Often, it can be difficult to see what's happening in a relationship when we are in it. So, a break can help one to see their relationship from a clearer perspective.
The inward journey will take one to discover their insecurities and the ideas / beliefs that have formed them. These will usually be the ideas one has become attached to in their mind concerning their lack of worth.
For instance, themes of a lack of self-confidence and self-belief can be discovered through these ideas; the beliefs that one is not worthy of love can be discovered; one could perhaps discover that their jealousy is caused by their loneliness, their inability to be alone; one could perhaps also discover that their jealousy is caused by their expectations of the Other-Self, which is their inability to accept people for who they are; or perhaps, one will find that the cause of their jealousy is because they lack the ability to trust others, and the list goes on.
So, ultimately, one will have to develop Self-Acceptance, which will help them to fill everything that they lack within—because at the end of the day, Self-Love is really what one is lacking as it is the lack of it that is the cause of the Suffering States of Mind.
Thus from this perspective, one can see jealousy as a need for love from others because of the lack of love one has towards oneself.
By learning to address one's loneliness, one's self-confidence, one's ability to trust, one's ability to Accept oneself and others, the state of jealousy will eventually be addressed.
Generally speaking, by simply working on one's suffering states of the mind, one's jealousy will be released layer by layer because Jealousy is the unaddressed suffering states of mind.
One way to accelerate the journey of transforming one's jealousy is to just trust what the other person says instead of being suspicious of them. If your loved ones tell you that they love you, then simply take their word for it. No point in doubting their words because if they really wanted to leave you they wouldn't even make an effort to lie to you. So, it's best to trust that the other person loves you until there's hard evidence that they don't.
But a jealous mind may need hard evidence that they are still being loved. Thus, if one can learn to love themselves, then less evidence would be needed. So, it's important to learn to fill what one lacks within, which is Self-Love. Doing so will help one to balance their mind, preventing the states of over-thinking, over-reacting, and dwelling in unnecessary suffering.
Realize that the journey of Self-Transformation is not about becoming blind to the fact that the Other-Self may be cheating on us. But it's about transforming the state of mind within so that one can still be happy whether or not one's suspicions are true.
Whatever happens, happens. If someone doesn't love us anymore, then let it be. I mean, would you force yourself to love someone if you don't love them? So, there's no point in trying to change someone who no longer loves you. No point in trying to change the unchangeable. The only thing we can learn to do when other people don't love us is to love ourselves so that we can be happy.
Realize that there are billions of people out there in the world. If a relationship fails, just move forward to another.
The destination thus is towards learning to love ourselves because until we can, we'll continue to long for love from others to fill the lack of self-love within.
Know and Transform The Self!
Reading articles helps with understanding, but to transform the mind, one realizes the truth from experience.
For such an enlightening journey, the Self-Transformation Course has everything you will ever need!
